Zhen.

2009-06-01T06:41:00.001-07:00

Battlefield.

What do you want inside.

Yourself.

Tell me.

Voice out.

So that I can decide for you.

So long. The journey.

The droplets that fell to the ground.

What does it mean.

All the runbacks.

Seem so long.

All the water.

Why can't you be different.

Why must you make me feel that it is me that's why such things happen.

2009-05-14T08:06:00.001-07:00

Forget to mention that I feel happy...

To be loved .
To be called baby by you.
To be hugg
To be scolded
To be nagged

Practically everything

2009-05-14T07:47:00.000-07:00

Probably I don't even mean or understand what I'm gonna type here next.

All I know is I just feel like blogging.

Nothing in particular or please do not be mistaken that I'm feeing upset of any shit.

Because I am just plainly tired.

My eyes are dropping, mind running around. So in total I can't think well.

That is also the reason why I am typing at such a fast pace right now.

This isn't the life that I want to lead for the rest of my life.

I want something more, something more suitable for me.

This isn't gonna work.

I know it will end soon.

And I will be sad when it end.

but seriously it is still not my style.

okay this is not referring to my love.

Is it true that when girls have menses their mind will be unstable because of the hormones blah blah.

because I think it really works well.

haha.

Bullshit.

I want to become better.

Better.

Best. Or am I aiming to be a perfectionist?

nonono. that's too much.

But it seems that I am heading that way?

nonono. U turn man.

When you are in a relationship, what does it means when your mind is filled up with ideas or ways of how not to lose your partner?

Does this means that you are afraid? No confidence or what?

Is it how should one feel when he/she is in a relationship?

will you feel happy?

That's all

2009-05-08T22:17:00.000-07:00

I would like to go to a beach resort right now.

Sitting at the balcony with my earpiece on, listening to slow music.

At the same time, enjoy the beautiful scenery and peaceful moment.

Will be better if there's a heartwarming storybook to read and a soothing drink to go along with.

Not thinking of anything, not thinking of how to pace up with the hectic and messy life of me.

Now I feel that my life is running like a train.

Running at such a high speed that I do not know how to stop.

The tired and pressure just pile up till I can easily breakdown.

2009-05-05T08:18:00.000-07:00

Was browsing through ex's blog.

It makes me think.

Not in a bad way.

I don't know if we are consider as friends.

We once know each other but now we are total strangers.

So I will still consider as friends because I can't deny that we don't know each other before right?

For once, I feel happy for him.

It makes me realised that people do change through time.

From his blog and all, I can sense that he seems happier now.

Or rather simpler.

He gives me a very different feeling now.

And in some way it enlighten me.

Everything happens for a reason.

The most important thing is to just move on and learn from it.

Standing on the same spot wouldn't help.

Having the same mindset only hold you back.

I'm starting to piece up all the stories.

It took me years to do it.

But I'm sure it will walk out by itself one day.

I don't regret a single thing now. Not that little bit.

People who read this is gonna have question marks in their head. Oh well.

All the best James. =)

2009-04-30T03:11:00.001-07:00

I think I am sick in mind.
For what I am still haunted by that stupid history?
So sick man
Can't stand it.
If only it can be cured everything will be better.
For me at least..

Fuck man.
I'm hungry.
Can you be faster?

Says who?

Says me.

2009-04-19T05:51:00.000-07:00

Went to Royal China at Raffles Hotel with my family today.

It was horrible.

Not referring to the food.

To my dismay, I found a cockroach in the food.

How disgusting is that?

SUPER.

and the service was super bad to the extent that we cancelled all our orders.

I was super angry at how the service was being carried out when we confronted them about the horrible mistakes that they made.

From the point I enter the restaurant till the point I left, nothing was good.

Thus I decided it is time to apply what I have learn in school- communication skills.

I wrote a complaint letter.

I mean come on. This is Raffles hotel you are talking about.

Not another hawker stall incident?

If Raffles Hotel restaurant have this kind of standard too, I think it is way too much man.

On top of that. nothing did really went well.

Oh ya, I forgot to mention that boyfriend forgotten about me.

He has been always complaining that I forget about him.

Well, look who's the one that is forgetting who now?

Tomorrow is Monday.

Monday blues starts all over again.

but definitely not tomorrow. Because it's my DADDY's birthday!

2009-04-18T10:22:00.000-07:00

NYK IS FINALLY IN SINGAPORE..

and mind you... it's for good.

He has slim down so much that woah good looking uh!!

No joke =)

The moment I saw him, I was so happy that I can get tear anytime!

Lucky thing is that I control it, if not they will laugh at me!

See what kind of evil friends I have got myself.

I was happy that he didn't forget my birthday.

Instead, he bought me BOMBAY!

See guys, isn't he sweet? AWWW...

But anyway, I was more happy that he is back for good.

Serious, the most important thing is for him to be safe and back here.

=) you won't be lonely anymore!

I was literally bitching the whole days.

Poor Jeremy, Suyin and Benn had to listen all of it.

Sorry guys.

It was thanks to all these bitching then I realized things out of it that I never came across before.

I am very pampered. V E R Y.

No matter from my friends, family or even boyfriend.

My secondary friends pamper me a lot.

Although they seems to be finding me idiot but they are very concern and protective of me.

I am saying some of them. You know who you are.

=) thanks.

My family pamper me the most.

Whatever I want they will give me.

Even they have difficulties on their own they also won't let me down.

They worry for me most of the time.

My boyfriend also pamper me a lot.

He tries to do everything for me.

Being my punching bag is not enough.

He has to be my listening ears, my chauffeur and my carrier.

I guess I used to take all these pamper as granted?

I really love each and every one of them.

I love you NYK BENN JEREMY SUYIN WEISIONG.

You guys really meant a lot in me

Sorry for my nonsense, immature and retarded behaviour.

Though things are changing but do hold tight!

I love you Daddy, Mummy and Sister.

You guys really stand at the top top places.

Without you there won't be me.

I love you Samuel Tan.

Though you are annoying at times but you are still my boyfriend.

So get that into your head, better still hammer it in.

2009-04-16T08:01:00.000-07:00

Am I happy?

I would say yes but in me, I would pause for a moment.

I can't find the answer.

There seems to be something in me that I am thinking of.

But I just couldn't figure what it is about.

Kept asking myself what's missing.

If only I could understand myself..

On a lighter side, tomorrow is friday. =)

Anyway I have become the ugliest woman in this universe.

Back to my glasses.

Damn.. It was so awful and disgusting.

Yes contact lens is precious to me.

But it is not fitting well in my eyes recently.

I'm glad that I passed the days without even notice the date like I used to.

I guess it's finally over?

At least 99%? Or more than that.

Credits to the whole world.

I should have woke up earlier?

But anyway it was a good experience?

At least I have learnt a lot out from it.

The day is no more stuck and vital to me anymore.

I Thank God for helping me. =)

2009-04-15T08:15:00.000-07:00

Normally I only get to see retrenchment on serial drama, movie or newspaper.

Never did I expect to see the real process today in office.

It was so scary.

The whole building which consist of 50 level is filled up with tension.

Everyone is participating in this mind game except for a handful of people like me.

They had to play with their mind the whole morning thinking if they will be called to leave.

Initially I thought that I won't be affected by them as I don't really know them since it was my last day but nevertheless I feel for them.

Being able to see this happening right in front of me, I don't even have time to react or to think what expression should I give.

So wrong of me to go and console them because I don't even know them well.

But also at the same time so wrong of me just sit down there and watch the whole department consoling them.

So what I did was to call up my boss at CH and keep myself to the phone till they left.

Anal right?

Economic crisis really hits hard on people.

sighs.

Since when I am so concern about the business world?

Oh well.

At least I'm learning.

Anyway did I mention my pay is peanut to them?

nonono.

Should be RED BEAN only..

that's why I am not sack!

Everything just seems so different after yesterday night

2009-04-13T07:01:00.000-07:00

Today is Monday.

Which means there are still Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday to go.

GO GO Fighting.

I don't know how am I going to drag myself out of my bed but I guess I will still do it.

Working at ORQ is a TORTURE.

If anyone is free tmr, pls come and have lunch with me.

I almost ended up eating lunch alone this afternoon but lucky my sister saved me!

Shall post some photos up tomorrow?

ALAMAK..

I think my butt grow bigger!

Because of all the sitting down in office whole day.

I think my face turn paler.

Thanks to the thick make up I have to put on.

My daily routine to work.

Wake up.
Brush, Bathe and Change.
Tie hair, spray hair.
Wear slippers, walk to Compass.
Take train.
Put make-up in the train.
Sleep
Change into slippers at Dhoby Ghaut.
Reach office!

From Thursday onwards will be around the same.

Wake up
Brush, Bathe and Change.
Tie hair, Spray hair.
Wear slippers, walk to Compass.
Put makeup in train.
Sleep.
Alight @ Little India, take bus with the banglas.
Alight Bus, clean my hands because the handles is too oily.
Reach office.
Change Slippers!

2009-04-11T23:14:00.000-07:00

The above photos are taken when we send NYK off to CHINA.

Ironic. It's taken ages ago and he is coming back this week then I post his photos up.

oops..

Watched Shinjuku Incident yesterday.

I like the plot of the movie. BUT I hate the disgusting scene which is chopping of hands.

Turn off uh!

Anyway, I am so glad to announce that I have an idiot friend.

We took nearly 1 hour++ just to decide where to have our dinner last night.

So after much discussion, we ended up eating at Ashton @ gardens.

We bitch as usual and ended up stalking a girl who is pretty and hot!

The catching up/ gossiping/ exchanging view session with Suz was great!

It's been long time since we ever had it.

We always end up having the same kind of view about certain things.

especially our comments.

Hahaha. and she is such an ass. Within a night she broke my high score for bejewel!

ASS.

Anyway, I am super addicted to facebook recently. In terms of quizzes, bejewel, spot the diff.

And it's been super long since I go shopping.

But lucky thing is I have yet to have the craving at all.

Am i a GIRL?

HOPEFULLY!

anyway, tomorrow is MONDAY!

I just hope wednesday will be here soon.

Can't stand a sight in that office.

And I will be super lonely cause Nicole is not around.

Nonie will be in command house.

Awww.

Janice will be on leave.

Sighs.

To end of this post. I just want to say thanks dear for taking the trouble to make a trip to my house to collect my specs and waited for so long! =) Loves!

2009-04-10T10:04:00.000-07:00

ARGH.

I'm so pissed.

Didn't get to watch movie at all.
Stayed at home feeling bored.
Can't play Spot the diff. as I finished my plays for the day.
Stupid B game don't load at all.
Want to DL photos but I don't know where the hell the mouse is at.
Got no video to watch.

DAMN.

Bad night.

2009-04-10T05:57:00.000-07:00

WELCOME!

Love.

NYK's farewell party.

So finally I created a new blog again.
Seems that my habit hasn't changed uh.
Anyway, I can't stand the sight of the previous blog because it seems so dead.
In addition, it makes me lose interest blogging there already.
Nevermind. New blog New start. What a crap right? haha.

So internship has been drying up everyone.
The freedom, the sleep time etc.
Whatever it is, I still have 3 months ++ to go.
GO GO FIGHTING!

Working in UBS is certainly a great experience.
But for once in my internship, I felt that I;m doing something that is not related to my course.
These two weeks working in Raffles Place is a total different one.
I don;t like it at all. hope WED do pass fast.

I miss NYK. Only left a week more and he will be back in Singapore.
I miss all the friends that I used to hang out with.
I'm really nt hoping that all of us will grow apart in the near future.

Thinking back, although I stay in Sengkang, I don't feel the 'closeness' anymore.
I cycled round the whole SK not long ago to all the places that I used to hang out.
NorthVista, Rivervale Plaza, Rivervale mall etc.
They all seem to be the history.
I do miss them but oh well..

I'm really bored. Thats why you see me blogging here so nice. So probably tmr and tmr tmr I will do the same.

Is there places in Singapore that I can go to ?

hmmmm...

Anyway it's been a joy that my MACBOOK IS BACK IN ACTION!

Guess what. facebook is my best friend when I'm bored.
Thanks to NONIE SAN! I'm addicted to Spot the Difference.